Lactic Enlightenment Searching for the essence of Milk and Milk Bars


Posted on June 9th, 2004. About JellyFish.

In addition to Jellyfish, I also detest milk. Milk Shakes are fine. Ice cold fresh milk might be fine but I just can’t bring myself to try,

There is a good reason for this. When I was a wee nipper, we still had the free 1/3 pint of milk a day at primary school. (In the days before the Milk Snatcher). Anyway, what used to happen was that the milk delivery people used to just put the milk in little crates (the bottles were little too) outside the school doors. Now, in my school, nobody was bright enough to think to bring the milk in on a sweltering hot day. Ergo, the milk we were given at 11:00 or whatever was warm. Couple that with the facts (I’m certain) that we never were given the freshest milk in the first place and that some bottles would sit outside for days, basically meant that sometimes the milk we had was really 80% cheese.

Trying to suck sour, cheesy milk through a little blue straw was just too much for me. Nowadays I just can’t stand the smell of even slightly off milk.

But cold, fresh milk with pink syrup in it is a fantastic hangover cure.

There, I feel better having revealed that dark secret to you. I don’t think that it invalidates my quest.

Map Updated  

Posted on June 9th, 2004. About InSearchOfMilk.

Updated the map of known National Milk Bars Here

One Week On  

Posted on June 9th, 2004. About StatusReport.

One week after discovering a lack of NMB information on the web, we have the following to report.

National Milk Bars Known About: 13 (This is a hard number to pin down. Different information sources yield different answers.)
National Milk Bars Visited: 2
Cups of Tea Drunk: 2
Milkshakes Ordered: 0
Miles Driven: 288
Postcards Bought: 2
Jokes Told: 0
Hat Shops Photographed:1


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